My Pride & Joy

A Special, Holiday anecdote:

It's early morning - before 10 - on a holiday. Rapha wants to wear his Spiderman costume but...

1) it's in the 80's (30-something Celsius) outside and polyester doesn't breathe (go explain THAT to a 4-year-old)
2) because it doesn't breathe and said 4-year-old wears the costume from morning to night, it's well overdue for a visit to the laundry

I tell him no, explaining the above reasons. A temper tantrum ensues.

Suddenly, from the neighboring apartment a woman screams: "SHEKET!" (QUIET in Hebrew)

I say: "She's right, Raphael. It's a holiday morning and you're waking people up."

He goes very quiet and seemingly contemplating the matter, walks to the window sill and peers out to ostensibly get a look at the neighbor. Instead, he throws back his head and shrieks: "SHEKET!" into the silence.




That's my boy. Such an angel. I was laughing so hard I completely missing her shouted reply.

Tel Aviv Various, 2005

Architecture


Flag



Hilton Beach

Architecture



Gan Meier Flower Market

Girrrrrls....Come On Already!!!

A word of advice to women the world over and particularly those in this country who have not yet evolved:

PLAY NICE!!!

In other words, don't treat other women in a snake-like, vicious fashion unless they have truly earned it for behaving very badly.

What do I mean?

Well why don't I just illustrate with a personal example, hmmm?

Sitting in on a broadcast session earlier in the week for a potential voice-over job. The minute I walk into the room, the woman I'm ostensibly to learn from gives that vibe...You know the one. It's the look-you-up-and-down with spite and disgust, can't be bothered to glance in your direction again, don't you dare address me directly if you know what's good for you body language.

Clearly I don't know what's good for me because the minute the program director exits the room and we're alone together, I attempt to seize the opportunity - after very politely verifying that an interruption is appropriate - to ask her advice on negotiating a rate for said broadcasting position. Her clipped reply?

"Now is not the time to ask me. Maybe later. But just so you know, there is NOroom for negotiation. This is a pilot series. I don't get paid enough and we're all getting the same rate."

So it wasn't the time but she had the time to spew all of that other garbajeeolah in my direction? Like three words - two hundred dollars - would've been a strain? But it "wasn't the time"...Puuuuulleeeeezzze. Give me a break, Ms. I'm Too Important to Be Bothered with You.

Advice: Women in this country, you want to be evolved and have equal rights and rid yourselves of male oppression? Then stop treating other women like full time rivals out to steal something you have.

As former secretary of state Madeline Albright replied during a San Francisco Q&A to a question regarding her decision to make politics rather than motherhood a full time career:

(paraphrase) I don't think every woman is intended to be a full time mother
nor do I think every woman is cut out for a full time career. We're
all individuals with different needs.

But I will say, there is a special place in hell for those women who
treat other women badly for choosing one path over the other in life.

My heart still swells when I recall how the room exploded with applause.

Enough Said. Amen Madeline. Love you. Kiss kiss.

The Work Ethic in Socialist Realms

A True Story:

My friend Steve who lives in the Netanya area was between jobs and receiving government unemployment benefits. Towards the end of the benefit wagon, he began job seeking, successfully interviewed with a company, negotiated terms and was advised by management: "We'll call you tomorrow and give you a start date."

It took two weeks for them to call, at which time, of course, they asked him to start the very next day.

"Just one minute," he calmly countered with the smug assuredness of the person who knows he's clinched the spot and the other party is desperate. "I still have a month left of unemployment benefits and next week, the World Cup starts. So I just don't know about starting right now."

On the other end, silence and then a counter proposal some hours later:

"How's about you start next week and on the days England plays, you can stay home and on the other days you come in...?"

When's lunch break again?

So why Stay?

What keeps us here in lieu of the headache, hassle and bureaucratic hell?

It's home - the short answer. Nowhere else has felt this much like home. In fact, the entire concept of "home" comes into question, I believe, when a person has grown up in one place and yet finds the feeling of well being in another place altogether. Almost like a calling or longing. Very deep.

Medium length answer: Gorgeous, sea-side sunsets, summer dresses and sandals in October, an un-bridled sense of freedom, subsidized education, not being afraid of walking through the park with my son after dark, subsidized agricultural and dairy goods, not having to be terrified of letting my son out of my sight on the playground or in public.

The long answer shortened: To loosely borrow from David Horovitz's A Little Too Close To God, The Thrills and Panic of A Life in Israel , being alive at a time when Israel actually is in a state of statehood, impinges a sense of obligation regarding dwelling here. And no, I'm not religious. That's the more philosophical, not hugely in-depth but could lead to a lengthy discussion answer.

It Gets Thicker...

We've had a helluva week...As one becomes more thickly entwined with this culture, the daggers begin to flash and all flightiness is reserved for end of the day madness which boils down to an exhausted dinner or a walk in the park with child and dog.

I mean, who'dve thought that signing a child up for preschool would take four hours and hinge upon a city tax bill being placed in the preschooler's mother's name? Who'dve thought that because the apartment the preschooler lives in is owned by a dead woman who never left an inheritance letter, the procedure of changing over said tax bill would necessitate numerous letters, official papers and multiple appearances at the municipality? Who'd have thought that ultimately, city clerks - paid nominal salaries for sitting behind desks and telling people to come another day because they're too busy 1) talking on the cellphone 2) eating yogurt 3) discussing weekend forays with the neighboring clerk - would ultimately suggest a way to cheat around the system? Suffice it to say that the day spent at the municipality was one from hell ...one of many, I daresay, to be relished in the future.




I simply don't understand:

1) why it takes 4 hours to open a checking account (my mother thinks it's because the more steps and people involved in a process, the more jobs created)
2) how people can think they're pulling one over in broad daylight

Example:
Tonny asked tonight if I think Israelis are not all that great at business...Funny that. My reply can be offered via a shuk vendor's description of the dish towels he was selling:

"They look thin but really, they get thicker each time you put them in the laundry"....

Welcome to Israel. Have a Nice Day

SCHOOL!!!

Rapha started preschool...his first day. Oh what proud parents we were. And so thrilled for him to FINALLY be cavorting with peers again. A full month here without it and for the poor, sweetie it was sorely missing.

He was so excited carrying that Spiderman lunchbox, watching the other children as they arrived, attempting to communicate with the few, Thai kids that speak English.

Most of my focus was building towards this day. Find an apartment in order to have an address in order to be zoned in order to sign him up in order to not schlep him around with boring adults (us), in order to give him normalcy and routine, in order for him to be happy and so it goes....

The main differences between San Francisco preschool and the Tel Aviv equivalent:

- there are 32 (!) kids in class here, 3 teachers, no parents. That's a damned high ratio of child to teacher. In SF, it was one paid teacher and four working parents per day - That's 5:1. But part of the commitment of being in a co-op was parents' obligation of working one day per week, participating in committee work, fundraising, bi-annual clean ups, monthly meetings, monthly snack duty, monthly art project duty ...Oh My God!!! It felt like a black hole.

- class runs 6 hours each day as opposed to 3 in San Fran. The cost? Around $150 in Tel Aviv versus $230-250 in SF and that higher bill doesn't account for donations, time commitment, snacks, obligatory purchases, etc.

- The entire food approach is different. Here, the child eats at home, arrives to school at 7:30-8 with a sandwich for 10 a.m. snack, a bottle of water so the teacher can monitor liquid intake and 2 pieces of fresh fruit to add to the collective fruit basket divided among all at 11:30. At 13:30 kids go home for lunch. That's one meal and 1.5 snacks spread over 6 hours.

At Haight Ashbury Co-Op, Raph's San Fran school, the kids arrived at 09:30, ostensibly with full stomachs from breakfast. An hour later, snack - not to be taken lightly in these parts, as "snack" can mean macaroni & cheese, pizza, chicken sticks, oatmeal,....(obesity ain't rampant for nothing, kiddies!)

An hour and a half after snack was lunchtime. Full meals of sandwich, fruit, yogurt, chips, drink and so on from home.. Assuming the child wakes up at 07:00, that's 3 meal-sized portions within 5 hours. hmmmm...to ponder.


- Structure. School here has a defined, daily structure with clear goals: Developing coordination and social skills, teaching learning and motivation skills and so on. To reinforce this, each day is divided into time slots with focus on these skills for a set amount of time.

At HACNS it was open play all day every day aside from music each two weeks and a tumbling class every other week plus Friday show-and-tell. I prefer structure but okay..Free play does lead to creativity.

- And the clincher: On Fridays there is kabbalat shabbat and before the holidays, kids make decorations for the Jewish New Year and succot - not Easter or Christmas. This satisfies me immensely.

Raph hasn't a clue yet but these differences - subsidized education, book reading, an emphasis on learning, affordable education, food not being the focal point of structured time and celebrated holidays being Jewish rather than Christian are some of the strongest motivators which pushed me to return.

It is extremely rewarding to watch these pieces fall into place.